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| Marriage Tips of the Week |
Have a couple inventory session.
Share three positive things about your spouse with them--actions they do that you
appreciate, physical features you adore, or even an amazing memory of a time you felt
truly connected with them.
Then, share gently (and lovingly) one thing that they could work on this week that would
mean a great deal to you. It can be as simple as wiping the mirror after teeth-brushing
or making the bed without complaining...just share kindly. One way to approach it is, "I
would really appreciate if you could..." or "It would mean so much to me if you would...."
Now, it's your spouse's turn. Let them speak three positive things about you. Listen
without judging or correcting or undermining their words. Allow them to share one thing
that you could do that would help them this week. See what happens! You will both feel
more energized and connected!!
Then, end with a kiss.
Remember to follow-up next week by appreciating what they did that you asked them to
work on...even if it's not perfect. You might be surprised how quickly your admiration will
increase as you mutually work on appreciating and helping each other!
Focus on why you fell in love.
List 5 things each day your spouse did that you liked. (An added bonus is to
acknowledge to your spouse the things on your list. Saying “thank you” helps to cement
the relationship.)
Walking down memory lane is a good thing to do. It is best if done with your companion
to help jog your memories. One of my favorite things to do is to lay on my husband’s lap
and look at the lights of the Christmas tree. This has been our Christmas tradition for
as long as I can remember. During this quiet time, we like to talk about past
Christmases, the past year, and our dreams, goals and vision for the next year. We do
this after the children are in bed, or now that they are older, while they watch a movie, text
to their friends or play a video game in the next room.
Quiet time to remember why you fell in love is a good thing for a marriage. It is easy to
get caught up in the hustle and bustle of day-to-day life and forget the reasons we
married in the first place. Those reasons are still there, perhaps hidden by layers of
living life, but nonetheless are still there waiting to be recognized. MPower your
relationship by taking some time (write it on the calendar) each week to “walk down
memory lane” with your husband or wife, and see your relationship strengthen.
Write a weekly love note to your spouse.
Write your spouse a love note. A few years ago, I found that I was not as connected with
my husband as I wanted to be. I was not feeling healthy, and I needed to do something
to change my attitude toward him. I thought a lot about what I could do and discovered
the idea of writing a love note. So, I decided to write a love to him every week.
I would hide the love note in different places, mostly under his pillow, for him to
discover. I wrote on different days each week. He did not expect to receive more love
notes, so each week his discovery was new. After a month, though, he started to
anticipate finding a note.
Love notes can contain appreciation, share a treasured memory or share a dream for
the future. Anything is acceptable, as long as it is positive and not a complaint. I found
that my attitude changed. Instead of seeing only the negative qualities in my husband
(he worked hard and was gone a lot of the time and I wanted him to be home more), I
remembered why I loved him, and I saw all that he was doing that I had not
acknowledged. Before I began to write love notes to him, I had chosen to see what he
didn’t give me that I wanted; now I was focusing on all that he was doing to support and
care for me.
Even after I changed my attitude, I continue to write the notes because of the joy the
notes bring to him. When life is great, he sees that I share his joy. When he has a
tough day or week or month, writing a love not helps him understand that I am there to
support and sustain him. In especially difficult times, love notes are written more
frequently. Writing love notes takes us away from the busy and hurried world we live in
and lets us enjoy the pleasure of being in love.
Try writing a love note to your companion each week for the month of January and see
the difference it makes in your marriage.
Share three positive things about your spouse with them--actions they do that you
appreciate, physical features you adore, or even an amazing memory of a time you felt
truly connected with them.
Then, share gently (and lovingly) one thing that they could work on this week that would
mean a great deal to you. It can be as simple as wiping the mirror after teeth-brushing
or making the bed without complaining...just share kindly. One way to approach it is, "I
would really appreciate if you could..." or "It would mean so much to me if you would...."
Now, it's your spouse's turn. Let them speak three positive things about you. Listen
without judging or correcting or undermining their words. Allow them to share one thing
that you could do that would help them this week. See what happens! You will both feel
more energized and connected!!
Then, end with a kiss.
Remember to follow-up next week by appreciating what they did that you asked them to
work on...even if it's not perfect. You might be surprised how quickly your admiration will
increase as you mutually work on appreciating and helping each other!
Focus on why you fell in love.
List 5 things each day your spouse did that you liked. (An added bonus is to
acknowledge to your spouse the things on your list. Saying “thank you” helps to cement
the relationship.)
Walking down memory lane is a good thing to do. It is best if done with your companion
to help jog your memories. One of my favorite things to do is to lay on my husband’s lap
and look at the lights of the Christmas tree. This has been our Christmas tradition for
as long as I can remember. During this quiet time, we like to talk about past
Christmases, the past year, and our dreams, goals and vision for the next year. We do
this after the children are in bed, or now that they are older, while they watch a movie, text
to their friends or play a video game in the next room.
Quiet time to remember why you fell in love is a good thing for a marriage. It is easy to
get caught up in the hustle and bustle of day-to-day life and forget the reasons we
married in the first place. Those reasons are still there, perhaps hidden by layers of
living life, but nonetheless are still there waiting to be recognized. MPower your
relationship by taking some time (write it on the calendar) each week to “walk down
memory lane” with your husband or wife, and see your relationship strengthen.
Write a weekly love note to your spouse.
Write your spouse a love note. A few years ago, I found that I was not as connected with
my husband as I wanted to be. I was not feeling healthy, and I needed to do something
to change my attitude toward him. I thought a lot about what I could do and discovered
the idea of writing a love note. So, I decided to write a love to him every week.
I would hide the love note in different places, mostly under his pillow, for him to
discover. I wrote on different days each week. He did not expect to receive more love
notes, so each week his discovery was new. After a month, though, he started to
anticipate finding a note.
Love notes can contain appreciation, share a treasured memory or share a dream for
the future. Anything is acceptable, as long as it is positive and not a complaint. I found
that my attitude changed. Instead of seeing only the negative qualities in my husband
(he worked hard and was gone a lot of the time and I wanted him to be home more), I
remembered why I loved him, and I saw all that he was doing that I had not
acknowledged. Before I began to write love notes to him, I had chosen to see what he
didn’t give me that I wanted; now I was focusing on all that he was doing to support and
care for me.
Even after I changed my attitude, I continue to write the notes because of the joy the
notes bring to him. When life is great, he sees that I share his joy. When he has a
tough day or week or month, writing a love not helps him understand that I am there to
support and sustain him. In especially difficult times, love notes are written more
frequently. Writing love notes takes us away from the busy and hurried world we live in
and lets us enjoy the pleasure of being in love.
Try writing a love note to your companion each week for the month of January and see
the difference it makes in your marriage.
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