1.  Breathe.  When I was folding towels and doing various laundry/cleaning tasks, I found myself paying attention to my breath, much like when I am doing yoga.  I would inhale through my nose and exhale through my mouth, and I was amazed how folding towels could be so relaxing.

2.  Sing.  I find myself happier and calmer when I am singing around the house.  I often turn on Pandora or play my iPod when I am doing dishes or cooking dinner.  I love singing–and I probably enjoy it more because I am doing #1 (breathing) while I am singing.

3.  *Exercise.  I have been sedentary through periods of my life and active through others.  I find that I am calmer, more relaxed, and better equipped to deal with the stresses which do come up when I am expressing energy (and producing endorphins) through exercise.  The exercises I enjoy are yoga, swimming, running, and biking.  (I also have done some Zumba classes lately, which are tons of fun and a great work out through Latin dancing–but a little hard on my knees!)

4.  Laugh.  When my kiddos have made a huge mess, or if I’m feeling particularly stressed, if I can laugh about what is going on–or even sit down to watch a funny movie–or go out and laugh with my husband or a good friend–I find I am more relaxed and able to find joy in my day-to-day experiences.

5.  Count Your Blessings.  When I take a moment to look back on all my current blessings and ponder the multitude of tender mercies which are constantly present in my life, I feel relaxed.  As I focus on the positive aspects of my life, I am more apt to remember my current mantra:  “Everything always works out.” (Sorry for the dangling preposition, but that really is my mantra right now.)  And, if you look back on your life, I bet you will find the same is true.

Well, hopefully one of these suggestions will help you through your week.  I look forward to your feedback!  Happy Monday!!!!

*Disclaimer:  This blog post is not intended to be a substitute for medical advice or constitute anything of the kind.  Please consult your physician or personal trainer before embarking on an exercise program.  mpowergen.com and mpowergen.com/blog hold no responsibility for any issues that happen to you from following the advice of this blog post.

In preparation for times when I would need to take care of my children on a more full-time basis (like when they were newborns or now like during the summer or a road trip), I have pondered the need to condition myself for this thing called mothering. I think I began preparing when I was younger, caring first for baby dolls, then for siblings or neighbor children. I would care for these children for a few hours at a time…and then, several years later, became a full-time mommy.

Caring for our first child was shocking, to say the least. Though he was called a “good baby” (what does that mean, anyway? Aren’t all babies “good?”), I still had many a sleepless night, many a tearful eye, many a swollen place on my body and many a tender place in my heart.

By the time #3 came, I was on my own relatively soon–caring for three little people full-time. I handled the joys and rigors of motherhood fairly well.

Fairly well, in fact, until I was expecting twins. Whoa. I was terrified. How could I be prepared to care for two babies at once? I tried to cultivate calm in my heart and fill my spiritual reservoir for the busy moments to come. I began planning quick meals and snacks to have the caloric intake necessary to nurse twins. And I prayed. Boy, did I pray…!

With the help of family, friends, & neighbors, I was able to find moments of joy even through such a busy time. When I got out of “survival mode,” I noticed a need surfacing to recharge, to center myself so I could adequately care for my children. I made time for meditation & peaceful moments.

Over time, the practice of mothering has helped me condition myself into a better mother. I enjoy the work I do…and am excited to think that the work I do is preparing me for even more fun…as a grandmother!!!!

Motherhood is a daily lesson in humility, at least for me. Take, for example, the little experience I had just a few years ago. I was doing my daughter’s hair for church one Sunday morning (a rare act for me at the time) and—horror of horrors!—I noticed something move. I wanted to rub my eyes. Was I hallucinating? Nope, there it was again. A tiny looking bug, smaller than a grain of rice. In her hair. Yup, it was head lice. Suppressing my desire to jump up and down and scream, I took those ten calming breaths they used to natter on about, and tried to calm down.
I was powerless to prevent a shrill tone in my voice. My daughter knew something big was occurring as I demanded of my husband, “Look, here! What do you think? It’s lice, right?” He muttered something non-committal as I went into full-combat mode. I requested that my husband stay home with the kids—I had church responsibilities, and we didn’t want to infect anyone else—and calmly suggested that he shave the boys’ heads, military-style.
After my due diligence at church, I decided my “ox was in the mire”, and went to our local large-mart to acquire every last lice removal product known to civilized man. Here’s the lesson in humility. Forget buying family planning or feminine hygiene products…true embarrassment is achieved with the perusal and purchase of lice-removal shampoo. To compound my problem, it wasn’t found in the shampoo aisle (where it should’ve been, and I could have been pretending to examine the merits of full-body versus moisturizing while in reality studying the brands of lice shampoo.) No, it was in the First Aid aisle! So, I had to pretend to study bandages (Antibiotic included? Fabric? Plastic?) while surreptitiously gathering intelligence on the various brands of lice shampoo. In the end I purchased a dozen of the most likely-looking boxes, (with overly-optimistic names like “Lice-B-gone” and “Lice-X”) wishing vainly that I had brought a hat and dark sunglasses inside the store. Ah, mortification at its finest!
Long story short, we eradicated the lice threat. As a bonus, I believe I actually learned a few things from the experience. I learned that those so-called lice shampoos don’t work, but that the combs do a fair job getting the nits. Also, five gallons of olive oil worked through the hair, and the application of a cheap shower cap (overnight, or at least four hours) does a fair job at sending those little buggers to their eternal rest. Marathon combing sessions are a great way to bond with your daughter. Additionally, any promises made to your teenager who comes to complain after you made him cut his hair (even though he didn’t have lice), and the subsequent teasing at school forces you to promise (rashly and emotionally) that you will never make him cut his hair again, will be remembered each and every time you make a comment about the hair for the rest of his life. It’s those rash promises that you remember the most. Good times.

I have had problems with my eyes for years. I needed cataract surgery and we had to postpone it until the inflammation in my eyes calmed down. When I finally was able to have the surgery on my eye, I had to wear a patch for seven weeks. It was a long time. I worried that my grandchildren would be afraid of me. I didn’t want the patch to scare them. Our favorite activity is for me to read stories to my grandchildren. I love for them to sit on my lap or by my side as we read. I didn’t want to miss that because they were afraid of me with a patch on my eye.

I came to my daughter’s house for dinner one Sunday after my surgery. I was sitting on the couch in her living room and John, then 3, said to me, “Eye hurt?” pointing to the patch. I said it did. None of my great-grandchildren were afraid of me. During the next seven weeks, our relationship was the same.

After the seven weeks were over and my patch was removed, I was again at my daughter’s home for Sunday dinner. I was sitting on the couch and John came up to me and said, “Eye all better now?” None of the other children ever asked about it. None of them were afraid. John was so compassionate and so feeling with his great grandma and her eye surgery.

How can we show compassion today?

After checking her oxygen levels & giving her two nebulizer treatments, the doctor put our little girl on oxygen & called an ambulence to transport her to the hospital.

She was admitted immediately & diagnosed with a collapsed lung, pneumonia, and RSV. She didn’t fight the doctor or nurses who cared for her and performed various uncomfortable tests because of her weakened condition. Before the end of that day, her twin brother was also admitted with similar, though less severe, symptoms.

As I sat in these hospital rooms, going back and forth to nurse and comfort our babies, with my dear husband caring for them in turn, and with family & friends supporting & aiding with our older three children, I still felt troubled. I had nursed my twins, as difficult as that had been, to give them nutrients & vitamins…I had kept them home most of the time out of germs, only attending church…I was doing all I thought I could do. Why was this happening to me? I was just about to close a chapter on one of the most difficult years of my life, and now this?

Through much prayer & faith & persevering through a tough five days, both twins were released to go home with a stronger, better mother. I reached new levels of understanding where I would have been quick to judge before on the weaknesses of others. I had greater gratitude for family & friends who took care of the other details of my life so I could take care of my babies.

As I look back on that time each year about now, I feel grateful…grateful for lessons I’ve learned, grateful for the gift of life, & grateful we will be celebrating their fifth birthdays soon. I also think of a quotation from Elaine Dalton which I admire. She once said, “I can do hard things.”

We can all do hard things. If we will allow, these “hard things” can teach us and refine our character; they can build us where we are weak and strengthen us to be prepared for even greater experiences. With the help of heaven and those around us, we can do all things we are given.

What hard things have you experienced? What have you learned? What will you experience this year to build your character and understanding?