Nov 09
2
In Deed? or Word?
When I was a little girl, I used to sit next to my amazing great-grandmother in church on Sundays. My my mother played the organ for the service, and my dad sat on the rostrum because of his church assigment. Due to their responsibilities, I received an enormous blessing of being close to my great-grandma. I remember that she would scratch my back gently. As she did this, I would reach behind and scratch a place on my back where I wanted to be scratched, but I think she was enjoying the service and did not notice. 
I have begun to think lately about the times in my life when I have showed someone without words a positive behavior or action, times when I have tried to quietly set an example. Sometimes, I avoid speaking out because of fear of confrontation or rejection. Sometimes, I avoid speaking because I find a degree of difficulty in discerning what my feelings and desires are that I want to share. Sometimes, I avoid speaking because I don’t want to imposition someone. I have often heard that actions speak louder than words…but I have noticed recently that appropriate words are oh, so important, too! (Like not just playing the piano and expecting my children to follow, but encouraging with words, too!)
For instance, each morning we have a devotional time with our six children where we pray, sing, and read scripture. I expect that they should know to sit quietly because that is the example that Trevor and I set for them…but they don’t. (Do you think it could be because they are 10 yrs-18 months old?!?!?) Well, this morning, I decided to “use my words” and discuss expectations with them before we started. I think expressing expectations through words and following up with positive behaviorial examples is powerful! Because I am primarily an auditory learner, I need to hear the words spoken as someone communicates with me.
As I express love to my children, I know that my actions are powerful as I hug them, kiss them, tickle them, or cuddle with them. They respond to the touch of love. I have also noticed that kind words, well-placed in conversation, share with them love on a different level than touching them. The words coupled with actions communicate love to the core of their spirits, and I see a difference in their behavior and love toward me. I am working each day to express my feelings and desires in deed…and in word. How ab0ut you?
